


Don't Date Monsters (Except, Definitely Date Monsters)

by Scriptor_Bellum



Category: Monstrata Fracture (Video Game)
Genre: F/F, F/M, Family Issues, Fluff, I'll add tags and stuff as more things show up and whatnot!, I'm excite, M/M, Reader-Insert, Relationship Problems, Self Confidence Issues, human reader
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-17
Updated: 2019-03-16
Packaged: 2019-11-19 13:54:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,098
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18136613
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Scriptor_Bellum/pseuds/Scriptor_Bellum
Summary: A collection of reader inserts for the Monstrata Fracture characters created by the lovely Astralore team!Cross-posted from my Tumblr monster blog, monstrousboyfriends.tumblr.com/Ch 1: You and Nikolai have a serious talk.





	Don't Date Monsters (Except, Definitely Date Monsters)

**Author's Note:**

> You and Nikolai have a serious talk. He makes not-promises. They sound very pretty.

It’s only when you pull away completely that Nikolai starts to look bewildered.

Your heart hasn’t been in the kiss and touches from the beginning tonight. Has he even noticed? The look on his face suggests that he thought everything was fine until now.

“Darling?” Even his voice carries a load of confusion. His hands have stopped exploring your body, having paused on your shoulders. His colorful eyes bore into yours, and for once, he actually looks sort of innocent. Like he really is wondering why you moved and if he did something wrong. “What’s the matter?” He tries to smirk, but there’s something vulnerable behind it. “I’m not being too eager, am I? You’ll have to forgive me. You’ve been so busy _studying,_ it’s been a while since we’ve–”

You decide it’s better to interrupt him before he gets too far. “Nikolai, do you love me?”

For a moment, he just blinks owlishly at you. “… I… what?”

“Do you love me, Nikolai?” You almost can’t believe you need to repeat this.

He looks… stunned. It seems like he doesn’t really know how to respond. Rainbow irises turn down from your face, brows knitting together as he stares at your hands. The room is quiet for a long time, or at least what feels like a long time. You’d pat yourself on the back for rendering someone like your boyfriend speechless, if it weren’t somehow sad to see.

Finally, he finds his voice again. “Ah, would you like a drink? You know, I have one bottle that’s exactly the color of your eyes.”

“Don’t… don’t _do that,_ Nikolai.” To your credit, you’re avoiding his gaze just as much as he’s avoiding yours. If he doesn’t want to look you in the eye, why should you bother trying to do the same?

“Do what?”

“Do _that!_ That thing you always do, offering me a drink or flirting with me when I wanna talk to you!”

He huffs, crossing his arms at you. More than anything he looks like a petulant child who’s just been reprimanded for doing something he knows he shouldn’t. “You never had any problem with it before! You usually take a drink or flirt back!”

“Well, maybe I’m sick of taking a drink or flirting back just to make you happy! Whenever I take a drink or flirt back, it turns into you changing the subject! Why don’t you want to talk to me?”

“Don’t put words in my mouth… if I didn’t want to talk to you, I wouldn’t keep you around!”

That’s exactly the attitude you’ve been thinking about. That careless, haughty, borderline cruel way he seems to view everyone who isn’t in his circle. Even you aren’t exempt from being spoken to like he thinks nothing of the lives of people who aren’t like him.

You clench your fists against your legs. “You wouldn’t _keep me around,_ huh? So I should be happy that you’ve decided I’m entertaining enough to _keep around,_ like I’m some kind of toy that you’re gonna get bored of soon? I should be _happy_ that you would rather distract me with booze and sex instead of have me say something you don’t wanna hear?”

Something flashes in his eyes that you’ve never seen before. It’s equal parts stormy and hurt, and you don’t know which part to pay more attention to. “You… you…!” He gets to his feet, stomping over toward the door. “If you’re going to talk to me like that, maybe you should just leave! It seems like you’re in a foul mood tonight and I want none of it!”

“Why, because it isn’t what _you_ want me to be like?” Although you’re far from hostile to most people, you’re fed up with Nikolai just dismissing any concerns you have. It’s like he thinks what you have to say doesn’t matter unless it’s something he wants to hear. “I really like you, Nikolai, but I don’t exist just to make you happy! I have feelings of my own! You’ve been in bad moods before, and you talk to me and other people like you think we’re not worth anything! And I could have told you to leave when you were in a bad mood, but I didn’t! I just sat closer and tried to make you feel better, because that’s what you do when you care about someone! And how I’m talking to you is _leagues_ better than how you talk to and about everyone who isn’t just like you! But, hey, this stuff only matters when it’s _you,_ right? I mean, do you realize how much of an asshole you are most of the time, or are you just ignoring it?”

He sputters for a moment, just staring at you wide-eyed as if he can’t believe what you’re saying. Maybe he can’t. It seems like nobody has ever been this brutally honest with him before. All his friends think the world of him, and it’s all too clear he’s been spoiled his entire life. Has anyone ever really taken the time to be honest with him, especially since this is the reaction they’d get?

A lot of people would back off of being honest when the other person started to get upset. Likely, Nikolai is used to that. He’s rich and his family is influential and he could ruin anyone’s life if he really wanted to. And he _knows it._ He’s willing to flash everything he’s got and he’s willing to ruin people’s lives or at least mess with them if the mood strikes him. Who the hell would take the chance of making someone like that angry?

… Well. You, apparently.

After a moment of staring at you, Nikolai breaks eye contact and runs his talons through his hair to smooth it back. If you had to choose a word to describe how he looks right now, it would be _shaken._ He looks like he doesn’t really even know what to do. “… Do you want a drink or not? Because I think I need one, and I don’t like drinking alone.”

“Nikolai. Stop. Seriously. I’m not kidding around. I don’t want a drink, and I am going to be monumentally pissed if _you_ have one right now.” If this is the way he’s always handled relationships, with distraction, it’s probably unfair to expect more without guiding him. Hopefully your voice sounds a little less harsh now, although your words are still firm. You’re not going to accept being placated with strong spirits and intimate touches.

What you want to know is why he feels the need to distract _himself_ with alcohol while you’re in the middle of a conversation.

Everything is eerily silent until Nikolai sits down again. At least he has the decency to look ashamed and solemn. Before now, you wondered if he even had the ability to be serious about anything.

You take the initiative to move closer, placing a hand on his wing. Your fingers gently brush over all his beautiful feathers; trying to calm him down. Perhaps if you remind him that you do care about him, that you want to stay, he’ll be more open to talking. “Listen, Nikolai. I don’t want to be mad at you, and I don’t want you mad at me. Can’t we just talk? Without having to be distracted or trying to change the subject? This is important.”

“But I don’t want to talk. Not about this. Why can’t you just let it go? Why can’t you just be happy with how we are? Why did you return my affections if you think I’m such a terrible person?” His eyes are pointed down again, completely avoiding you. It’s a relief that he isn’t throwing a tantrum anymore, and yet, seeing him so grave about something as simple as talking about your feelings for each other… it’s concerning.

You run your fingers down his wing and stop at his hand – carefully wrapping your fingers around his talons. He still seems like a child, but now it’s less petulant and more frustrated. “It was just a question, Niko. I don’t think you’re a _terrible person_ ; you’re just such a jerk most of the time. You _can_ be nice, too, so I don’t get why you’d rather act like a tool. Why don’t you want to talk to me about things like this? Things that could give us a better understanding of each other and improve any problems we have with each other?”

His body tenses up, including his talons. It’s like he doesn’t want to let go despite the fact that he was trying his damnedest to push you away a minute ago. “Because…” A deep breath is sucked in, and he quickly turns away from you so that his voice is barely audible. “Because I’m… _scared._ ”

“Scared?” Did you… hear that right? You’ve never known Nikolai to be scared of anything or anyone. He’s always in control of every situation and you got the impression that he was above ‘lowly’ things like fear. A little thread of sympathy for him tugs at your heart. “Scared of what, Nikolai?”

“Of… this.” The sigh he lets out makes it clear that he knows that’s a vague, unhelpful answer. He closes his eyes, then reopens them after a couple of seconds. “You brought this up because it’s a problem. You asked me if I loved you. I’m your _boyfriend._ You shouldn’t have to ask something like that. If you’re asking that, it’s because you feel unappreciated. You feel like I don’t care about you. That kind of problem is the kind that breaks couples up.”

You give his hand a soft squeeze. Ah. At the very least, he’s actually talking to you now and showing you a side of himself that isn’t just vain, lustful, or mean-spirited. “And you don’t want us to break up. You’re scared… of losing me.”

He closes his eyes again before nodding. “I don’t think I’ve ever been more scared of anything in my life. That itself is terrifying. You feel like I don’t care about you, but in the last… what has it been, nine months now? I’ve grown extremely attached to you. Even though we don’t spend every minute together, I…”

“Yeah?” You squeeze his talons again. “Don’t leave me hanging here. The suspense is killing me,” you joke with a half-smile. “Come on, Niko. You were doing so well. I like that we’re talking like this. It makes me feel like I know you better – like I’m closer to you. It’s okay.”

“… I have to confess, it’s gotten hard to imagine my life without you.” When he opens his eyes this time, it’s only a fraction. Delicate eyelashes hang over his bright eyes, threatening to close completely for a third time. “You’re a mystery to me and every day I learn something new about you. I’ve never had that with anyone before. Usually I’m so good at reading people and getting them to do what I want. You’re… different. I can’t _make_ you do anything and I don’t know everything about you and I just – I _want_ to know everything. If you leave me… I’ll miss you.”

It makes you unbelievably happy that he’s being honest with you. This kind of raw vulnerability is something that you thought you would never see from him. Did your words drag it out of him by force, or did he decide it was time to talk rather than risk losing you?

You lean over and press a kiss to his cheek. “Do you love me, Nikolai?”

A series of halfhearted grumbles streams past his lips. “I don’t know. I can’t answer yes or no without it being a partial lie, because I’m just not sure. What I can tell you is that I do care about you, regardless of how I act or speak, and if it’s making you question my feelings for you… it’s… something I’ll try to change.” There’s the faintest of smiles on his face as he looks over to you. “No promises. Just know that you are very special to me. I care deeply about you and I apologize if many… _most…_ of the things I’ve done have made you doubt that.”

That smile slowly turns into a subtle smirk. “As you so eloquently put it, I believe… I really like you.”

With that, you pull him fully into your arms and bury your face against his shoulder. The way his wings immediately wrap around you tells you everything you need to know.

“That’s all I needed to hear.”


End file.
